Leadership is often one of the most challenging parts of becoming an entrepreneur. The tasks of communicating clearly, taking decisive action, facing conflict and holding space for others proved to be some of the most challenging obstacles I have faced. Along with this was my desire to lead in a way that felt humane and natural to me. All of these layers compounding together created the most uncomfortable growth experience I have ever faced.
A girlfriend and fellow business owner once told me, owning a business is a spiritual practice. It will bring you to your knees in ways you have never expected, and she wasn’t lying.
Before owning our company, I worked alongside the AlphaGraphics of West Houston team for seven years. With nothing more than Sandler sales and management training, we bought the business in 2017. Overnight I became the boss and instantly felt like I was drowning. With four years under my belt and facing my leadership fear straight on, here are some reflections and tips to consider.
Fuck Ups Are Only Half The Battle
The other half is processing through situations after they occur. After you have a moment to collect your thoughts and take a deep breath, think about what happened and use these questions to do a self-evaluation:
- What did I do right?
- What could I have done differently?
- Where do I need to improve?
This practice brings a sense of self-awareness to your role as a leader. Which is, in my opinion, a must-have if you are a leader. There is nothing worse than being led by someone who isn’t willing to self-reflect and own their role in any situation.
Not Everyone Will Be Happy
It is unrealistic to think all of your team will be pleased with new processes, policies, systems or structures. To think this expectation can be met is to set yourself up for failure and add unnecessary stress to your life.
Without knowing why, I can guess your reason for becoming an entrepreneur is similar to ours, to provide better opportunities for yourself and your family. It will be important to remember your why as you encounter this situation. You are here to run a profitable business…Not a group therapy session.
Swift Decision Making
…is not my forte, but I’m getting better at it!
Most of the struggle stems from the negative self-talk we encounter along the way or the lack of details provided in the moment. Three ways you can work through this weak point is by acknowledging you’ll never have all the details. Never. AFTER your waist-deep in the shit-storm, details may start to surface, at which point you can pivot or adjust accordingly. Owning this fact helps your mindset going into the situation.
You may have to eat crow. Sorry y’all, but if your pride is big, this is going to be a hard pill to swallow. I cannot tell you how many times I have had to do this and could literally feel the words lodged in my throat.
Did I mention being an entrepreneur was a spiritual practice?!
After a delightful crow pie meal, I encourage you to ask your team for feedback, guidance or other solutions. Do not let it be beneath you to do this practice. Showing your vulnerability shows you care enough about them and the company to humble yourself before them.
Language Matters
Our company culture is constantly being worked on to allow space for team members to feel comfortable communicating without fear of being shamed or dismissed. The key here is encouraging expression to be made with integrity and without disrespecting other team members. Focus on the behaviors, not the people.
Personally, it is important to me for our team to feel heard, seen and understood. Even if I do not agree with the feedback or thoughts shared, I may respond with something like “thank you for your feedback, I will take it into consideration.” or “Thank you for having the courage to use your voice.”
Holding Space in the Workplace
This leads me to the act of holding space for others. I am learning how to do this in the workplace. This practice can drain you of energy if you are not prepared with the right tools and resources. I wrote about holding space in another blog more centric from a personal perspective, but here are some of the ways I do this differently in the workplace:
- I make sure I am available for private discussions
- Connection through active listening
- Honest and transparent dialogue
Some may argue that this is too much from a leader, I would argue this is basic human needs.
You Are Only Human
Leadership is not for the faint of heart. It is challenging, messy, and stressful…but it is also rewarding, encouraging and soul-filling. Continue seeking education to better your leadership skills, not just for yourself but for your team, family and community.
I often go back to these three truths:
I didn’t know what I didn’t know.
I gave my best and will make an effort to not repeat the mistake again.
I am only human.
🎧 Song: Flavor by Maren Morris
